Parents, do you feel like you are endlessly nagging your teens to get their homework done? Teens, are you sick of hearing your parents nag?
Some of my clients are benefiting from creating a “nag plan” with their parents. Check out this video to hear more about what a “nag plan” is, and how one family is implementing it at home.
A word of warning: a “Nag Plan” is not for every family or every student! I have some students who totally shut down EVERY TIME their parents remind them to do anything. However, there are other teens who recognize they NEED their parents’ support to stay motivated, and because of that, they feel better when they can control how their parents’ nag. That’s what’s so special about a “Nag Plan”. Check out the video and see if you think it’ll work for you.
Hey there, don’t have time for the full video? No worries, here’s a short summary:
I have a client who has just the worst executive function skills you’ve ever seen. He has a terrible time getting started on his homework. He’s a senior in high school and relies on his mom nagging him to get his homework done, and he’s okay, mostly, with his mom nagging him. That said, his mom is going out of the country for two weeks and it’s a crucial time in the semester, so his dad will have to take over the nagging. So we sat down in our last session and discussed a “nag plan” or an agreement between the student and parent that would work for both of them regarding the nagging so that hopefully the student will be less ornery and the parent doesn’t have to worry. So here’s a copy of the nag plan we came up with:
The first check mark is that on weekends the student and dad will start and end each day looking at a to-do list to see what needs to be done and checking things off at the end of the day. The next thing, is that the student would like a check-in every 20 to 30 minutes; however, the dad then asked, “yes, but when I’ve checked in in the past, you get mad at me, so what should I say when I check in?” The student said he’d like the dad to say, “How far along are you?”, so now we have an actual script from the student to the parent. Next, the dad asked the son to use a program called Self Control that blocks certain websites for an hour to help him focus, which the son agreed with. And then we discussed breaks, how long they should be, what the activities allowed should be, etc. And finally, we talked about how the son was going to try and respond to his dad, and I told the dad that if the son was being too ornery, then he could just text me and I’d text the student, after all, that’s what I’m there for.
I haven’t yet heard how this nag plan is working out, but I wanted to get this video out to you all because I think a nag plan is a great thing for families to have, just to make some agreements about how communication around homework and follow through is going to happen. And if you feel that you could use some outside help with your homework and studying, please consider checking out The Anti-Boring Approach to Powerful Studying™.